Pepe Le Pew

One of the coworkers I had in our Cybersecurity Division down in the Land of Endless Summers, I called Pepe Le Pew.

The reason is, he was a walking talking sexual harassment suit waiting to happen. He blatantly hit on women, insisting on touching them whether they wanted to be touched or not, and when they shrank away, he got legitimately offended. A couple women even went so far as to tell him that if he ever touched them again, they’d break his fingers, or worse, but that didn’t stop him. If anything, it made it worse and he took it as a sign of their interest. He was also not the best smelling person in the world, and his hands always seemed to be very clammy, forcing most people, man or woman, to feel the overwhelming desire to wash their hands immediately after shaking his hand, or at the very least wipe their hands on their trousers.

Even other guys were grossed out and made completely uncomfortable by him. He’d come up to guys who were sitting in a chair, stand uncomfortably close behind them, put both of his hands on their shoulders, and watch in silence at whatever it was they were doing.And Pepe did this almost to the exclusion of his job, and when several of us tried to think of anything he did related to his job, we all came up empty, and the most he really ever did was answer the occasional email with something that had nothing to do with the original email, or with random stuff that basically confirmed that he was only interested in humping any female with a pulse, which only further grossed people out. How on earth he kept his job and got as FEW official complaints as he did was a matter of some debate within our department.

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